The title of this chapter is completely self explanatory. The tables contained in here are filled with lists of completely useless equipment. It is almost certain that these artifacts have existed in every society in one form or another. Random junque is useless equipment, but if the persona can somehow make use of it during the campaign, then that is fantastic. There should be copious EXPS awards for players that turn nothing into something. Random junque is not entirely worthless, it has a random value of 1 to 10 eps, and each piece of random junque has a 10% chance of having a spare part useful to a mechanic.

To generate random junque the player makes one roll on Table 51.0, Random Junque, and then refers to the designated table type. Random junque does not count as a roll for players generating start up Toys.

Random Junque

Roll on Table 51.0 to start your junque adventure.

Table 51.0 Random Junque Type

This is a list of junk. It is a random list.

Die Roll (1d100)		Junque Type
01-07	1)	Appliances
08-14	2)	Armour
15-21	3)	Books
22-28	4)	Clothing
29-35	5)	Fiddle Junque
36-42	6)	Foodstuff
43-49	7)	Furniture
50-56	8)	Live Stock
57-63	9)	Materials
64-70	10)	Musical Instruments
71-77	11)	Personal
78-84	12)	Sports Equipment
85-91	13)	Stationery
92-95	14)	Weapons
96-99	15)	Miscellaneous
00		Ref's Own Table
Die Roll		Junque Type

1) Appliances

Every civilization has its kitchenware of convenience.

Table 51.1 Appliances

A list of junkie appliances.

Die Rolle (1d100)	Appliance
01-04	Blender
05-08	Clothes Dryer
09-12	Clothes Washer
13-16	Computer Keyboard
17-20	Coffee Maker
21-24	Crock Pot
25-28	Dish Washer
29-32	Disk Drive
33-36	Electric Can Opener
37-40	Food Dryer
41-44	Food Processor
45-48	Freezer
49-52	Fridge
53-56	Juicer
57-60	Meat Grinder
61-64	Meat Slicer
65-68	Microwave Cooker
69-72	Oven, Convection
73-76	Television
77-80	Toaster
81-84	Trash Compactor
85-88	Typewriter
89-92	Vacuum
93-96	Waffle Iron
97-99	Wall Phone
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Appliance

2) Armour

Things you would never expect as armour.

Table 51.2 Armour

Junkie armour alternatives.

Die Roll (1d100)	Armour
01-06	Fireplace Screen (Chain)
07-12	Concrete (Scale)
13-18	Suede Furniture Cover (HIde)
19-24	Fur Coat (Furs)
25-30	Garbage Can Lid (Shield)
31-36	Bucket, Lampshade (Helmet)
37-42	Belts (Leather)
43-48	Shower Curtain (Net)
49-54	Shag Rugs (Padded)
55-60	Fungus Weave (Fibre)
61-66	Garbage Can (Plate)
67-72	Looped Coat Hangers (Ring)
73-78	Chain Link Fence (Ring)
79-84	Hardwood Flooring (Shield)
85-90	Street Signs (Splint)
91-96	Mattress (Ballistic)
97-99	RInk Boards (Plastix)
00	Ref's Own Table

3) Books

Rare medium.

Table 51.3 Books

Ancient, or far futuristic, hard copy collections of useless information.

Die Roll (1d100)	Book
01-10	Book of Imperial Ethics
11-20	Colouring Book
21-30	Comic Book
31-40	How To.. (something useless)
41-50	Little Golden Book
51-60	Magazines (not naughty)
61-70	Pamphlets (religious)
71-80	Paperback (romance)
81-90	Revelations 1 through 6
91-99	Textbooks (arts only)
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Book

4) Clothing

Stuff to wear.

Table 51.4 Clothing

Clothing. Worthless. Not armour. Not cool. Not in style.

Die Roll (1d100)	Clothing Item
01-02	Apron
03-04	Bathrobe, No Belt
05-06	Belt
07-08	Beret
09-10	Boot
11-12	Bowler
13-14	Coat
15-16	Down Jacket
17-18	Face mask
19-20	Gi
21-22	Girdle
23-24	Glasses
25-26	Gloves
27-28	Habit
29-30	Halter Top
31-32	Havelock
33-34	Hoop Skirt
35-36	Jacket
37-38	Jock Strap
39-40	Jumpsuit
41-42	Kilt
43-44	Kimono
45-46	Knee Pads
47-48	Lederhosen
49-50	Leg Warmers
51-52	Longjohns
53-54	Mouthguard
55-56	Pajamas
57-58	Pants
59-60	Pea Jacket
61-62	Poncho
63-64	Rainsuit
65-66	Shirt Blouse
67-68	Shoe (just one)
69-70	Skirt
71-72	Slacks
72-74	Socks
75-76	Sombrero
77-78	Suspenders
79-80	Sweat Shirt
81-82	Sweater
83-84	Swimsuit (one piece)
85-86	Ties of bow
87-88	Toga
89-90	Top Hat
91-92	Toque
93-94	Trenchcoat
95-96	Tuxedo
97-98	Undergarments
99	Zoot Suit
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Clothing Item

5) Fiddle Junk

Even more purposeless than the usual random junque.

Table 51.5 Fiddle Junk

Things that go whiz and click.

Die Roll (1d100)	Fiddle Junk Type
01-10	Magnetic Balls, Rocks
11-20	Pet Rock, Pet Dirt
21-30	Phosphorescent things
31-40	Puzzles of not all pieces
41-50	Silly Putty
51-60	Slinky
61-70	Snow Globe
71-80	Squeaky Toys
81-90	Things that go whiz and click.
91-99	Worry Stone
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Fiddle Junk

6) Foodstuffs

Food has two parts. Type and container. There is rarely enough food to have a meal.

Table 51.6.1 Foodstuff Type

Om nom nom nom.

Die Roll (1d100)	Foodstuff Type
01-10	Candy
11-20	Cookie
21-30	Fruit
31-40	Fungus
41-50	Gum
51-60	Insect (edible)
61-70	Meat (protein from organic creatures)
71-80	Nut
81-90	Vegetable
91-99	Small Live Edible
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Type

Table 51.6.2 Foodstuff Container

It is useless om noms stored as described below. Yes a frozen gaseous cookie is possible.

Die Roll (1d100)	Container
01-10	Canned, Gas
11-20	Canned, Liquid
21-30	Canned, Solid
31-40	Dried, Bagged
41-50	Fresh, Solid
51-60	Fresh, Liquid
61-70	Frozen, Gas
71-80	Frozen, Liquid
81-90	Frozen, Solid
91-99	Pull Can One Cook
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Container

7) Furniture

Table 51.7 Furniture

Stuff to sit on. Not antiques. Not designer. Not pretty.

Die Rolle (1d100)	Furniture
01-04	Bathtub
05-08	Bed
09-12	Bidet
13-16	Bookshelf
17-20	Card Table
21-24	Carpet
25-28	Chair
29-32	Curtain
33-36	Cushions
37-40	Desk
41-44	Drawer (single alone)
45-48	Folding Chair
49-52	Foot Stool
53-56	Futon (mattress part only)
57-60	Hammock
61-64	Ironing Board
65-68	Lamp
69-72	Lawn Chair
73-76	Loveseat
77-80	Shelf (single alone)
81-84	Sink (no taps or drain)
85-88	Sofa
89-92	Stool
93-96	Table
97-99	Unwelcome Mat
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Furniture

8) Livestock

Roll alien description, and biology, but do not include any useful attributes. It will be a small, weak, dumb, slow and useless piece of livestock. The livestock will constantly make a noise rolled on the Livestock Noise Table.

Table 51.8 Livestock

Not edible. Does not warn of danger. Makes aggravating noises. Usually smells bad.

Die Rolle (1d100)	Livestock Noise
01-04	Barfing
05-08	Barking
09-12	Baying
13-16	Burping
17-20	Crackling
21-24	Growling
25-28	Grunting
29-32	Gurgling
33-36	Hissing
37-40	Howling
41-44	Humming
45-48	Meowing
49-52	Mewing
53-56	Moaning Pains
57-60	Moaning, Pleasures
61-64	Mooing
65-68	Oinking
69-72	Popping
73	Ruffling
74-77	Snorting
78-79	Sniffling
80	Suckling
81-84	Whimpering
85-88	Whining
89-92	Woofing
93-96	Yapping
97-99	Yelping
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Noise

9) Material

Table 51.9 Material

Stuff that could be used to build stuff, but not on it's own in isolation.

Die Roll (1d100)	Material
01-10	Bricks (3-12)
11-20	Concrete Mix
21-30	Linoleum
31-40	Lumber
41-50	Manure
51-60	Plastic Scraps
61-70	Plasticene
71-80	Straw Bale (one)
81-90	Tin Roll
91-99	Twine Ball (short lengths)
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Material

10) Musical Instrument

Table 51.10 Musical Instrument

Perpetually out of tune musical devices that resemble the one's on the list.

Die Roll (1d100)	Instrument Type
01-05	Accordian
06-10	Banjo
11-15	Castanets
16-20	Conductor Baton
21-25	Cymbal (one)
26-30	Drum (one)
31-35	Electric Guitar
36-40	Electric Organ
41-45	Harmonica
46-50	Kazoo
51-55	Lazer Harp
56-60	Nose Flute
61-65	Nose Harp
66-70	Piano
71-75	Saw
76-80	Spoons
81-85	Triangle (no baton)
86-90	Tuba
91-95	Tympani
96-97	Violin
98	Washboard
99	Whistle
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Instrument

11) Personal Items

Table 51.11 Personal Item

Personal junk that is as ineffective as it is junky.

Die Rolle (1d100)	Personal Item
01-04	Anal Cream
05-08	Backscratcher
09-12	Brush
13-16	Comb
17-20	Cosmetics
21-24	Diaper (one)
25-28	Deodorant (non aromatic)
29-32	Electric Toothbrush
33-36	Furpoo (Hair wash)
37-40	Hair Dryer
41-44	Hair Curler
45-48	Hair Net
49-52	Mirror
53-56	Nail Clippers
57-60	Nail File
61-64	Perfume
65-72	Razor
73-76	Shampoo (fake pooh)
77-80	Soap (half a bar)
81-84	Talcum
85-88	Toilet Paper (half roll)
89-92	Toothbrush
93-96	Tweezers
97-99	Twizzler (for Ear)
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Personal Item

12) Sports

Table 51.12 Sporting Equipment

The useless junky tools of useless participatory events.

Die Roll (1d100)	Sporting Good
01-05	Ball, Oblong Inflated
06-10	Ball, Small Hard
11-15	Ball, Beach
16-20	Ball, For Kicking
21-25	Ball, Golf
26-30	Ball Hoop (no net)
31-35	Climbing Stuff
36-40	Exercise Bike
41-45	Hurdle (two)
46-50	Hitter (racquet, bat, pole, stick)
51-55	Ice Skates
56-60	Protective Device
61-65	Roller Skates
66-70	Rowing Machine
71-75	Shirt (Sports Team)
76-80	Shoes (spikes)
81-85	Skis (no poles)
86-90	Starting Blocks
91-95	Treadmill
96-99	Weights (hand or foot)
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Sporting Good

13) Stationary

Table 51.13 Stationery

Not sessile useless junk, but stationery useless junk.

Die Rolle (1d100)	Stationery
01-04	Brushes
05-08	Chalk
09-12	Chalkboard
13-16	Clamp
17-20	Compass
21-24	Crayons
25-28	Dividers
29-32	Elastics
33-36	Eraser
37-40	Glue
41-44	Hole Punch
45-48	Letter Opener (not pointy)
49-52	Paint
53-56	Paper
57-60	Paperclips
61-64	Pen
65-68	Pencil
69-72	Pencil Sharpener
73-76	Protractor
77-80	Ruler
81-84	Scissors
85-88	Stapler
89-92	Tape
93-96	Three Hole Punch
97-99	Thumbtacks
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Stationery

14) Weapons

Table 51.14 Weapons

Thrusting and striking weapon alternatives.

Die Roll (1d100)	Alternate	Weapon
01-04	Hand Shovel	Axe
05-08	Wire Wrap	Brass Knuckles
09-12	Loose Spring	Bullwhip
13-16	Hose and sprinkler	Flail, small
17-20	Rake	Fork
21-24	Wrench	Hammer
25-28	Coat Rack	Lance, small
29-32	Flagpole	Lance, large
33-36	Pipe	Mace, small
37-40	Crowbar	Mace, large
41-44	Ball and chain	Morning Star
45-48	Lunch Box	Object, Throwing
49-52	Broken bottle	Orchid (razor glove)
53-56	Board and Nail	Pick, small, Boomerang
57-60	Hoe	Pick, large
61-64	Ice pick	Point (dagger)
65-68	Saw	Scimitar
69-72	Tin Can Lid	Shuriken
73-76	Pointed Stick	Spear
77-80	Cane	Staff, small
81-84	Crutch	Staff, large
85-88	Dish	Wham
89-92	T-Square	Boomerang
93-96	Umbrella	Short Sword
97-99	Chain	Chain
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Alternate	Weapon

15) Miscellaneous

Table 51.15 Miscellaneous

If it was missed about it was shoved in here. This list is not exhaustive.

Die Roll (1d100)	Miscellaneous
01	Baby Car Seat
02	Bag Opener
03	Baseball Cards
04	Bathrobe Belt
05	Backpack
06	Birdcage
07	Bolts
08	Book Binder
09	Book Holder
10	Book Mark
11	Bottle Opener
12	Boxes Small Plastic
13	Buttons, For Shirt
14	Calendar
15	Calling Cards
16	Can Opener
17	Claim Tag, Baggage
18	Clock Radio
19	Coaster
20	Coat Hanger
21	Coin Holder
22	Container, Bag
23	Cornucopia, Empty
24	Cushion
25	Dog Tags, For Dog
26	Duotang
27	Fishing Pole
28	Flower Pot
29	Garbage Bags
30	Ghetto Blaster
31	Headphones
32	Hinges
33	Hose, No Nozzle
34	Hose Nozzle
35	Hubcap
36	Retractable Clothesline
37	Insoles
38	Ironing Board Cover
39	Jars, Plastix or Glass
40	Key Ring, No Keys
41	Keys
42	Kitty Litter
43	Kleenex
44	Lens Cap
45	Letter Closer
46	Letter Holder
47	Light Bulb
48	Light, Candle or Torch
49	Mirror
50	Mobile, Kids
51	Nails, Press On
52	Needle, No Thread
53	Nuts, No Bolts
54	Oil, For Leather
55	Pencil Holder
56	Pet Leash, No Collar
57	Picture Frame, Empty
58	Plastic NY Tree
59	Pocket Protector
60	Pop Bottle
61	Pot
62	Pole
63	Pouch, Snap Closed
64	Purse
65	Puzzle Piece
66	Quiver, Empty
67	Robe, Fancy
68	Roof Tile
69	Sack, Itchy
70	Shoe Horn
71	Shoe Stretcher
72	Shoe String
73	Shovel, Beach Plastic
74	Sock Hanger
75	Spike Holder
76	Spool, No Thread
77	Sprinkler
78	Stickers
79	String, Ball of
80	Tap, for Sink
81	Tassles
82	Thumbtack Holder
83	Tinderbox
84	Tire, Small
85	Tire Valve
86	Tire Tread Piece
87	Toilet Seat
88	Toilet Seat Cover
89	Toilet Plunger
90	Tree Decoration
91	Tripod
92	Washboard
93	Medi Kit
94	Watch Winder
95	Wind Shield Wiper
96	Window Frame
97	Window Squeegie
98	Wire Holder
99	Wet Nap
00	Ref's Own Table
Die Roll	Miscellaneous

16) Ref’s Own Table

The ref’s own table for random junque should consist of those useless things that are found in the culture that she is creating. It may be a bit cynical, but this system is created with the belief that their will always be waste, incompetence and corruption available to waste corporate, and government dollars on useless items. Another thing to consider is whether or not it is worth having a refs own table for random junque. There are lots of things to prepare for the referee already, and unless random junque is really offering something humorous to the milieu then may she should go do something else.