Chapter 51: Random Junque

The title of this chapter is completely self explanatory. The tables contained in here are filled with lists of completely useless equipment. It is almost certain that these artifacts have existed in every society in one form or another. Random junque is useless equipment, but if the persona can somehow make use of it during the campaign, then that is fantastic. There should be copious EXPS awards for players that turn nothing into something. Random junque is not entirely worthless, it has a random value of 1 to 10 eps, and each piece of random junque has a 10% chance of having a spare part useful to a mechanic.

To generate random junque the player makes one roll on Table 51.0, Random Junque, and then refers to the designated table type. Random junque does not count as a roll for players generating start up Toys.

One anthro's garbage is another anthro's junk.
One anthro’s garbage is another anthro’s junk.

Random Junque

Roll on Table 51.0 to start your junque adventure.

Table 51.0 Random Junque Type

This is a list of junk. It is a random list.
Die Roll (1d100) Junque Type
Die RollJunque Type
01-071)Appliances
08-142)Armour
15-213)Books
22-284)Clothing
29-355)Fiddle Junque
36-426)Foodstuff
43-497)Furniture
50-568)Live Stock
57-639)Materials
64-7010)Musical Instruments
71-7711)Personal
78-8412)Sports Equipment
85-9113)Stationery
92-9514)Weapons
96-9915)Miscellaneous
00Ref's Own Table
One eon's essentials are another eon's junk.
One eon’s essentials are another eon’s junk.

1) Appliances

Every civilization has its kitchenware of convenience.

Table 51.1 Appliances

A list of junkie appliances.
Die Rolle (1d100)Appliance
Die RollAppliance
01-04Blender
05-08Clothes Dryer
09-12Clothes Washer
13-16Computer Keyboard
17-20Coffee Maker
21-24Crock Pot
25-28Dish Washer
29-32Disk Drive
33-36Electric Can Opener
37-40Food Dryer
41-44Food Processor
45-48Freezer
49-52Fridge
53-56Juicer
57-60Meat Grinder
61-64Meat Slicer
65-68Microwave Cooker
69-72Oven, Convection
73-76Television
77-80Toaster
81-84Trash Compactor
85-88Typewriter
89-92Vacuum
93-96Waffle Iron
97-99Wall Phone
00Ref's Own Table

2) Armour

Things you would never expect as armour.

Table 51.2 Armour

Junkie armour alternatives.
Die Roll (1d100)Armour
00Ref's Own Table
01-06Fireplace Screen (Chain)
07-12Concrete (Scale)
13-18Suede Furniture Cover (HIde)
19-24Fur Coat (Furs)
25-30Garbage Can Lid (Shield)
31-36Bucket, Lampshade (Helmet)
37-42Belts (Leather)
43-48 Shower Curtain (Net)
49-54Shag Rugs (Padded)
55-60Fungus Weave (Fibre)
61-66Garbage Can (Plate)
67-72Looped Coat Hangers (Ring)
73-78Chain Link Fence (Ring)
79-84Hardwood Flooring (Shield)
85-90Street Signs (Splint)
91-96Mattress (Ballistic)
97-99RInk Boards (Plastix)
Ancient data storage. Ancient clothing.
Ancient data storage. Ancient clothing.

3) Books

Rare medium.

Table 51.3 Books

Ancient, or far futuristic, hard copy collections of useless information.
Die Roll (1d100)Book
Die RollBook
01-10Book of Imperial Ethics
11-20Colouring Book
21-30Comic Book
31-40How To.. (something useless)
41-50Little Golden Book
51-60Magazines (not naughty)
61-70Pamphlets (religious)
71-80Paperback (romance)
81-90Revelations 1 through 6
91-99Textbooks (arts only)
00Ref's Own Table

4) Clothing

Stuff to wear.

Table 51.4 Clothing

Clothing. Worthless. Not armour. Not cool. Not in style.
Die Roll (1d100)Clothing Item
Die RollClothing Item
01-02Apron
03-04Bathrobe, No Belt
05-06Belt
07-08Beret
09-10Boot
11-12Bowler
13-14Coat
15-16Down Jacket
17-18Face mask
19-20Gi
21-22Girdle
23-24Glasses
25-26Gloves
27-28Habit
29-30Halter Top
31-32Havelock
33-34Hoop Skirt
35-36Jacket
37-38Jock Strap
39-40Jumpsuit
41-42Kilt
43-44Kimono
45-46Knee Pads
47-48Lederhosen
49-50Leg Warmers
51-52Longjohns
53-54Mouthguard
55-56Pajamas
57-58Pants
59-60Pea Jacket
61-62Poncho
63-64Rainsuit
65-66Shirt Blouse
67-68Shoe (just one)
69-70Skirt
71-72Slacks
72-74Socks
75-76Sombrero
77-78Suspenders
79-80Sweat Shirt
81-82Sweater
83-84Swimsuit (one piece)
85-86Ties of bow
87-88Toga
89-90Top Hat
91-92Toque
93-94Trenchcoat
95-96Tuxedo
97-98Undergarments
99Zoot Suit
00Ref's Own Table

5) Fiddle Junk

Even more purposeless than the usual random junque.

Table 51.5 Fiddle Junk

Things that go whiz and click.
Die Roll (1d100)Fiddle Junk Type
Die RollFiddle Junk
01-10Magnetic Balls, Rocks
11-20Pet Rock, Pet Dirt
21-30Phosphorescent things
31-40Puzzles of not all pieces
41-50Silly Putty
51-60Slinky
61-70Snow Globe
71-80Squeaky Toys
81-90Things that go whiz and click.
91-99Worry Stone
00Ref's Own Table

6) Foodstuffs

Food has two parts. Type and container. There is rarely enough food to have a meal.

Table 51.6.1 Foodstuff Type

Om nom nom nom.
Die Roll (1d100)Foodstuff Type
Die RollType
01-10Candy
11-20Cookie
21-30Fruit
31-40Fungus
41-50Gum
51-60Insect (edible)
61-70Meat (protein from organic creatures)
71-80Nut
81-90Vegetable
91-99Small Live Edible
00Ref's Own Table

Table 51.6.2 Foodstuff Container

It is useless om noms stored as described below. Yes a frozen gaseous cookie is possible.
Die Roll (1d100)Container
Die RollContainer
01-10Canned, Gas
11-20Canned, Liquid
21-30Canned, Solid
31-40Dried, Bagged
41-50Fresh, Solid
51-60Fresh, Liquid
61-70Frozen, Gas
71-80Frozen, Liquid
81-90Frozen, Solid
91-99Pull Can One Cook
00Ref's Own Table

7) Furniture

Table 51.7 Furniture

Stuff to sit on. Not antiques. Not designer. Not pretty.
Die Rolle (1d100)Furniture
Die RollFurniture
01-04Bathtub
05-08Bed
09-12Bidet
13-16Bookshelf
17-20Card Table
21-24Carpet
25-28Chair
29-32Curtain
33-36Cushions
37-40Desk
41-44Drawer (single alone)
45-48Folding Chair
49-52Foot Stool
53-56Futon (mattress part only)
57-60Hammock
61-64Ironing Board
65-68Lamp
69-72Lawn Chair
73-76Loveseat
77-80Shelf (single alone)
81-84Sink (no taps or drain)
85-88Sofa
89-92Stool
93-96Table
97-99Unwelcome Mat
00Ref's Own Table

8) Livestock

Roll alien description, and biology, but do not include any useful attributes. It will be a small, weak, dumb, slow and useless piece of livestock. The livestock will constantly make a noise rolled on the Livestock Noise Table.

Table 51.8 Livestock

Not edible. Does not warn of danger. Makes aggravating noises. Usually smells bad.
Die Rolle (1d100)Livestock Noise
Die RollNoise
01-04Barfing
05-08Barking
09-12Baying
13-16Burping
17-20Crackling
21-24Growling
25-28Grunting
29-32Gurgling
33-36Hissing
37-40Howling
41-44Humming
45-48Meowing
49-52Mewing
53-56Moaning Pains
57-60Moaning, Pleasures
61-64Mooing
65-68Oinking
69-72Popping
73Ruffling
74-77Snorting
78-79Sniffling
80Suckling
81-84Whimpering
85-88Whining
89-92Woofing
93-96Yapping
97-99Yelping
00Ref's Own Table

9) Material

Table 51.9 Material

Stuff that could be used to build stuff, but not on it's own in isolation.
Die Roll (1d100)Material
Die RollMaterial
01-10Bricks (3-12)
11-20Concrete Mix
21-30Linoleum
31-40Lumber
41-50Manure
51-60Plastic Scraps
61-70Plasticene
71-80Straw Bale (one)
81-90Tin Roll
91-99Twine Ball (short lengths)
00Ref's Own Table

10) Musical Instrument

Table 51.10 Musical Instrument

Perpetually out of tune musical devices that resemble the one's on the list.
Die Roll (1d100)Instrument Type
Die RollInstrument
01-05Accordian
06-10Banjo
11-15Castanets
16-20Conductor Baton
21-25Cymbal (one)
26-30Drum (one)
31-35Electric Guitar
36-40Electric Organ
41-45Harmonica
46-50Kazoo
51-55Lazer Harp
56-60Nose Flute
61-65Nose Harp
66-70Piano
71-75Saw
76-80Spoons
81-85Triangle (no baton)
86-90Tuba
91-95Tympani
96-97Violin
98Washboard
99Whistle
00Ref's Own Table

11) Personal Items

Table 51.11 Personal Item

Personal junk that is as ineffective as it is junky.
Die Rolle (1d100)Personal Item
Die RollPersonal Item
01-04Anal Cream
05-08Backscratcher
09-12Brush
13-16Comb
17-20Cosmetics
21-24Diaper (one)
25-28Deodorant (non aromatic)
29-32Electric Toothbrush
33-36Furpoo (Hair wash)
37-40Hair Dryer
41-44Hair Curler
45-48Hair Net
49-52Mirror
53-56Nail Clippers
57-60Nail File
61-64Perfume
65-72Razor
73-76Shampoo (fake pooh)
77-80Soap (half a bar)
81-84Talcum
85-88Toilet Paper (half roll)
89-92Toothbrush
93-96Tweezers
97-99Twizzler (for Ear)
00Ref's Own Table

12) Sports

Table 51.12 Sporting Equipment

The useless junky tools of useless participatory events.
Die Roll (1d100)Sporting Good
Die RollSporting Good
01-05Ball, Oblong Inflated
06-10Ball, Small Hard
11-15Ball, Beach
16-20Ball, For Kicking
21-25Ball, Golf
26-30Ball Hoop (no net)
31-35Climbing Stuff
36-40Exercise Bike
41-45Hurdle (two)
46-50Hitter (racquet, bat, pole, stick)
51-55Ice Skates
56-60Protective Device
61-65Roller Skates
66-70Rowing Machine
71-75Shirt (Sports Team)
76-80Shoes (spikes)
81-85Skis (no poles)
86-90Starting Blocks
91-95Treadmill
96-99Weights (hand or foot)
00Ref's Own Table

13) Stationary

Time Crime by H, Beam Piper. Illustrated by Kelly Freas. Astounding Science Fiction Magazine March 1955.
I have a deal for you.

Table 51.13 Stationery

Not sessile useless junk, but stationery useless junk.
Die Rolle (1d100)Stationery
Die RollStationery
01-04Brushes
05-08Chalk
09-12Chalkboard
13-16Clamp
17-20Compass
21-24Crayons
25-28Dividers
29-32Elastics
33-36Eraser
37-40Glue
41-44Hole Punch
45-48Letter Opener (not pointy)
49-52Paint
53-56Paper
57-60Paperclips
61-64Pen
65-68Pencil
69-72Pencil Sharpener
73-76Protractor
77-80Ruler
81-84Scissors
85-88Stapler
89-92Tape
93-96Three Hole Punch
97-99Thumbtacks
00Ref's Own Table

14) Weapons

Table 51.14 Weapons

Thrusting and striking weapon alternatives.
Die Roll (1d100)AlternateWeapon
Die RollAlternateWeapon
01-04Hand ShovelAxe
05-08Wire WrapBrass Knuckles
09-12Loose SpringBullwhip
13-16Hose and sprinklerFlail, small
17-20RakeFork
21-24WrenchHammer
25-28Coat RackLance, small
29-32FlagpoleLance, large
33-36PipeMace, small
37-40CrowbarMace, large
41-44Ball and chainMorning Star
45-48Lunch BoxObject, Throwing
49-52Broken bottleOrchid (razor glove)
53-56Board and NailPick, small, Boomerang
57-60HoePick, large
61-64Ice pickPoint (dagger)
65-68SawScimitar
69-72Tin Can LidShuriken
73-76Pointed StickSpear
77-80CaneStaff, small
81-84CrutchStaff, large
85-88DishWham
89-92T-SquareBoomerang
93-96Umbrella Short Sword
97-99ChainChain
00Ref's Own Table

15) Miscellaneous

Table 51.15 Miscellaneous

If it was missed about it was shoved in here. This list is not exhaustive.
Die Roll (1d100)Miscellaneous
Die RollMiscellaneous
01Baby Car Seat
02Bag Opener
03Baseball Cards
04Bathrobe Belt
05Backpack
06Birdcage
07Bolts
08Book Binder
09Book Holder
10Book Mark
11Bottle Opener
12Boxes Small Plastic
13Buttons, For Shirt
14Calendar
15Calling Cards
16Can Opener
17Claim Tag, Baggage
18Clock Radio
19Coaster
20Coat Hanger
21Coin Holder
22Container, Bag
23Cornucopia, Empty
24Cushion
25Dog Tags, For Dog
26Duotang
27Fishing Pole
28Flower Pot
29Garbage Bags
30Ghetto Blaster
31Headphones
32Hinges
33Hose, No Nozzle
34Hose Nozzle
35Hubcap
36Retractable Clothesline
37Insoles
38Ironing Board Cover
39Jars, Plastix or Glass
40Key Ring, No Keys
41Keys
42Kitty Litter
43Kleenex
44Lens Cap
45Letter Closer
46Letter Holder
47Light Bulb
48Light, Candle or Torch
49Mirror
50Mobile, Kids
51Nails, Press On
52Needle, No Thread
53Nuts, No Bolts
54Oil, For Leather
55Pencil Holder
56Pet Leash, No Collar
57Picture Frame, Empty
58Plastic NY Tree
59Pocket Protector
60Pop Bottle
61Pot
62Pole
63Pouch, Snap Closed
64Purse
65Puzzle Piece
66Quiver, Empty
67Robe, Fancy
68Roof Tile
69Sack, Itchy
70Shoe Horn
71Shoe Stretcher
72Shoe String
73Shovel, Beach Plastic
74Sock Hanger
75Spike Holder
76Spool, No Thread
77Sprinkler
78Stickers
79String, Ball of
80Tap, for Sink
81Tassles
82Thumbtack Holder
83Tinderbox
84Tire, Small
85Tire Valve
86Tire Tread Piece
87Toilet Seat
88Toilet Seat Cover
89Toilet Plunger
90Tree Decoration
91Tripod
92Washboard
93Medi Kit
94Watch Winder
95Wind Shield Wiper
96Window Frame
97Window Squeegie
98Wire Holder
99Wet Nap
00Ref's Own Table

16) Ref’s Own Table

The ref’s own table for random junque should consist of those useless things that are found in the culture that she is creating. It may be a bit cynical, but this system is created with the belief that their will always be waste, incompetence and corruption available to waste corporate, and government dollars on useless items. Another thing to consider is whether or not it is worth having a refs own table for random junque. There are lots of things to prepare for the referee already, and unless random junque is really offering something humorous to the milieu then may she should go do something else.